Sunday, September 18, 2016

Armchair Imagineering: Hooray For Halloween Parade

The first Mickey's Halloween Party of the year is this Friday. I got to go to that thing in 2013. It wasn't as mind-blowing as the advertising (and price tag) would have you believe, but it was fun enough. There honestly wasn't that much going on that there wouldn't be on any normal Disneyland evening, it's just that on this occasion, it was Halloween-themed. Speaking as a grown-up, the best part was getting to wander around Disneyland in a costume. (I was the “it's a small world” Clock Tower.) The “candy stations” were nothing to write home about and I don't usually go in for rave dancing.
And then there was the unique live entertainment, which I would describe as a mixed bag. The “Cadaver Dans”—i.e. The Dapper Dans with ghoulish makeup and a spooky song repertoire—were a lot of fun. The “Halloween Screams” fireworks show is fantastic, and I think it's practically criminal that they only show it at the party. The parade, though—”Mickey's Costume Party Cavalcade”—was rather disappointing. It just felt very thrown-together, with cheap floats, uninspired music and dancing, and an overall lack of imagination and effort.
Orlando's Magic Kingdom, by contrast, has a Halloween parade—Mickey's Boo-To-You Halloween Parade—that's pretty dang slick..but rather than simply wish to have theirs imported over here,* I thought I'd Armchair Imagineer a better one from scratch! Inspired by the wonderful A Christmas Fantasy Parade, I would make this parade an elaborate, tightly themed spectacle that really brings across the spirit of the holiday in all its facets (or at least all the facets that are family-friendly enough for Disneyland). Accordingly, rather than spamming the most marketable characters, I would choose characters and IPs that actually reflect aspects of Halloween...while still including plenty of crowd-pleasers so the average guest can still find a favorite!
Disneyland Dilettante readers, I give you...the Hooray For Halloween Parade!



General

The parade is held after dark, as Halloween events generally ought to be. Since the very youngest kids are usually in bed by then, it can be a little spookier than typical Disneyland fare, but nothing gruesome or truly horrific will be in the offing.
The music, in the tradition of the best Disneyland parades, consists of an original theme song plus an appropriate medley for each unit, all interwoven for seamless transitions as the parade progresses down the route. The main theme is peppy and alternates between major and minor keys in order to give the impression of spookiness without sounding threatening.
Unless their normal appearance is already Halloween-worthy, characters appear “in costume”—some of them show up for meet-and-greets in suitable costumes as it is during this time of year, and there's no reason not to use the same fuzzy suits in the parade.


Opening Unit: This Is Halloween!


For our opener, who better to lead the parade than Jack Skellington? (It's better than having him spend Halloween vandalizing the Haunted Mansion with Christmas decorations, that's for dang sure.) Actually, he's not quite at the head of the procession. First comes an assortment of spooky Disney characters from a variety of sources—the Lonesome Ghosts (from the 1937 short of the same name), Witch Hazel (“Trick or Treat,” 1952), the skeletons of 1929's “Skeleton Dance” (riding the Dapper Dans' four-seat tandem bike), and not least, Mickey Mouse and the gang in their Halloween costumes.
Why not the Headless Horseman? For two reasons. First, I thought it would be dicey to have one person on horseback amid several on foot/bicycle. I've had my foot stepped on by a horse before, and even under ideal circumstances (you're not in the middle of doing anything and it doesn't hurt you) it kind of brings the world to a screeching halt. Second, Walt Disney World may choose to start their Halloween parade with a bang and more power to them, but my model here is to start small and friendly and increase the grandeur as the parade goes along.
So these relatively harmless, comical characters serve as the vanguard for a Nightmare Before Christmas float that is itself not too fancy, yet. Made to look like the film's iconic Spiral Hill, with a huge glowing moon propped overhead and lots of jack-o-lanterns around the base, it features the Jack Skellington and Sally face characters, plus simple animatronics of other key characters from the film. Jack boisterously waves and greets the crowd; Sally is a bit more restrained, fitting her more subdued personality.
The music for this unit mixes the parade's main theme with the melodies of “This is Halloween” and “Oogie Boogie's Song” from the film.


Scream Along With Monsters, Inc.

I've griped about the overuse of Pixar in Disneyland more than once, but there's a time and a place for everything. When you have a cast composed of monsters who have literally made a career out of scaring humans, that's plenty Halloween-ish in my book.
First up is a troupe of dancers in cute monster costumes, something like this, but in both men's and women's versions (and a variety of color palettes):

We could maybe do without the "sexy face" for our purposes, you think?

Or perhaps the costumes from the Pixar Play Parade could be repurposed. Either way, their dance moves involve lots of stomping and “claw hands” (shades of the Thriller dance, maybe?) and mock-snarly faces. The music draws from the Monsters, Inc. score and the song “Monster Mash.”
The float is a mock-up of a Monstropolis city block, with apartments, street lights, a STALK/DON'T STALK signal, etc. Jack-o-lanterns are placed on the window and door sills and carved to resemble the scariest thing of all, to a monster: human children. Sully, Mike Wazowski, and other characters from the film are present, miming along to a voice track where they encourage the crowd to scream and “Power the city!” The float's lights are hooked up to microphones that detect the crowd noise, so that they literally flare up in response to the screams.


Princesses' Masked Ball

There has to be a Princess unit. It's, like, the rules or something. I like to think this is at least more interesting than the usual approach.
The unit is headed by Cinderella's coach, looking more pumpkin-like than usual. The Fairy Godmother walks alongside, occasionally breaking away to interact with children in the crowd. She can tell the ones in costume their fairy godmother did a wonderful job, etc. Also present are Cinderella's mice friends, pushing themed handcarts—one features a giant book open to a page labeled “Halloween Costume Pattern” and the other is piled with outsized sewing supplies.
This is followed by a dance troupe of men and women in autumn-themed ballroom attire, each carrying a matching masquerade mask on a wand.
The rest of the included Princesses can be found on the main float, which takes the form of a ballroom floor decked out for the fall harvest—sheaves of wheat and corn, garlands of autumn leaves, draping fabric in autumnal colors, and pumpkins carved with regal and fairytale designs such as castles, crowns, and jewels. The Princesses are wearing autumnal variations on their usual gowns—Belle's is yellow-orange rather than golden yellow, Aurora's is a darker shade of lavender than usual, etc. They are also equipped with masquerade masks, each in a unique personal design—Tiana's resembles a Mardi Gras mask with feathers and sequins, Ariel's is decorated with sea shells and coral, etc. The Princesses alternate between waving to the crowd and playing peek-a-boo with their masks, and dancing to a three-quarter time version of the parade theme.


Sugar Rushing Through the Candy Corridor

Wreck-It Ralph needs more love. It's hard to think of a really slam-dunk way to create a permanent attraction based on it, but the fact that most of it takes place inside a candy-themed video game makes it a good candidate for a trick-or-treat motif. There's even a racer based on Halloween candy: Gloyd Orangeboar.


So for this unit, Vanellope and Gloyd lead the way in their signature karts, accompanied by dancers in candy corn and gumdrop costumes. The music samples from the Sugar Rush theme song, “Trick or Treat” from the 1952 Disney short, and “I Want Candy.” Behind them is the main float, a Sugar Rush-styled landscape forested with candy corn, black licorice, and “apple trees” composed of single giant caramel apples. Wreck-It Ralph and Fix-It Felix are aboard, carrying trick-or-treat buckets designed to appear as though made out of pixels. Parts of the float are collapsible so they can take turns “wrecking” and “fixing” the landscape. (This has nothing to do with Halloween in itself, but it gives them something in-character to do.)
I have toyed with the idea of having a few parade performers actually throw small wrapped candies to the crowd, but not all parents would appreciate having sugar foisted on their children without their prior consent. Probably best to leave that sort of thing to the small-town parades.


Madam Leota Calls Out the Spirits

You knew we'd get to the Haunted Mansion unit eventually, right? I choose to believe it's because it's a great idea and not because I'm that predictable. Mickey's Boo-To-You has an awesome Haunted Mansion unit, from which I will be borrowing ideas, but copying the entire thing wholesale is beneath me.
The music will naturally be a cover of “Grim Grinning Ghosts,” perhaps sampling from “The Headless Horseman” in order to keep it from being too straightforward. Dancing to this are my big “thefts” from the Orlando parade—a troupe of dancing gravediggers and another of ghostly ballroom dancers. The latter wear UV-reactive costumes and makeup so that they glow faintly under the black lights lining the parade route.
Also included are a few individual Mansion characters, walking along and interacting with the crowd. By this point in the parade, the spook factor is in high gear. I think the guests can handle things like a Constance Hatchaway with a glowing heartbeat under her gown and a bouquet that transforms into an axe (via retracting flowers), or a Hatbox Ghost with a mechanical head in his hatbox (the performer's real face is screened from view with black morphsuit fabric).
The float for this unit is the longest in the parade. A model of the Haunted Mansion, perhaps twelve or fifteen feet high, adorns the front, with mysterious lights flashing in its windows. Behind it, a giant version of Madam Leota's crystal ball rotates on its table, so that she faces everyone in turn while delivering her spiel. (Like the smaller one on the ride, it functions via interior projection mapping.) The rear of the float is a graveyard scene with Singing Busts and less high-profile (but still recognizable) ghost characters played by live performers.
The Hitchhiking Ghosts trail the float on foot, as if trying to catch a ride with it but constantly getting distracted with guest interactions.

That would make a fine finale all on its own, but I've got it in me for one more Halloween treat!


Villains' Frightful Finale

Disney theme park Halloweens tend to heavily feature the Villains...or at least the ones everyone recognizes. The events lean toward the corny, probably in the interest of not terrifying young children. But we've already come this far; why not go all the way in terms of Disney-level scariness?
Although other Villains are included, this unit revolves around Chernabog and the Night on Bald Mountain sequence from Fantasia. Leading the unit are several puppeteers in black bodysuits, wielding gauzy “ghosts” like the ones seen rising from their graves in the film. Next comes a troupe of dancers in garish harpy costumes (minus the visible nipples, since this is Disneyland after all). The music is of course a medley of themes from Mussorgsky's “Night on Bald Mountain."
The float depicts a grim, jagged landscape upon which various Villains ride. The terrain rises toward the back, which represents the peak of Bald Mountain itself. A massive puppet of Chernabog gesticulates atop the mountain, while more ghosts swirl around its slopes (some puppets on rotating tracks, others mapped projections).
A spectacle like that speaks for itself, so the Villains have no lines of dialogue. Helpfully, this also means that whichever Villain costumes are handiest may be pressed into service—if Captain Hook is being cleaned, the Queen of Hearts can take his place, and so on.**

And there you have it—a Halloween parade worthy of the course between Town Square and “it's a small world”! What do you say—would you wait on the curb for upwards of an hour in order to watch this baby?


* For one thing, their parades are designed for their parade route. Compare maps of the two parks and you should see why that matters.
** These are only examples. I would actually prioritize less comical, more genuinely threatening, Villains for this float.

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