Bragging Rights

I have literally been a regular Disneyland visitor as long as I can remember. In fact, one of my very earliest memories is of visiting Disneyland! With as many visits as I've racked up over the years—it must be in the hundreds by now—I've also picked up, well, some stories. Anyone with the money can walk in the front gate, ride some rides, and leave. That's a typical Disneyland experience. I've managed to have some fairly atypical experiences there—incidents that were enviable, or especially memorable, or just plain silly.

Here, in no particular order, are some of the Unusual Things I've Done At Disneyland:

After Action Report: Tropical Hideaway

Subtitle: In Which I Review A Restaurant For A Bit And Then Go Off About The SEA

I know you’ve been on tenterhooks waiting for this one: my in-depth review of the latest iteration of the big Adventureland eatery, the Tropical Hideaway! I’d previously meandered around the seating area and looked at stuff, but only on my most recent trip to the park did I finally take some time to enjoy the Hideaway in full.

I’ll start by saying…it’s not very well named. The phrase “tropical hideaway” is of course drawn from the lyrics of “(In the) Tiki Tiki Tiki Room,” but there’s nothing hidden about this place—it’s open to view from the main walkway in a way that its immediate predecessor, Aladdin’s Oasis, was not. This isn’t really a complaint, just an ironic observation.

Despite being so very public, it's a nice little place to hang out for a while. It has a unique music loop, featuring mid-century exotica by the likes of Les Baxter and Augie Colon, and the food is garnering high praise from just about everyone who tries it. There are two snack counters in the Tropical Hideaway. The more obvious one, with a big ostentatious sign, is Dole Whip, I Presume. The name alone is a stroke of genius—it references the original Adventureland snack stand, Sunkist, I Presume (which became the Bengal Barbecue in the late Eighties), right down to the curly cursive font in which “I Presume” is written:

But the thing is, you don't have to be aware of that reference to get the name, because it's all a riff on the famous “Dr. Livingstone, I presume” incident. This is a theme park reference done right. (We'll see about some done wrong in a little while.)

Unauthorized Fun: The Stormy Weather Tour

So it's been raining, here in sunny Southern California, and we're all a little confused. It kinda makes me envy those Annual Passholders who are in college or whatever and can just jet down to the park whenevs, because Disneyland is lovely in the rain. It's cool, much of the crowd dissipates, and it's especially nice after dark, with all the lights reflecting in the wet pavement.

But if you think about it...every day at Disneyland is a stormy one, at least if you use your imagination. A surprisingly high number of attractions use storm imagery to set the mood, drive the plot, and/or shake things up. Howling winds, torrential rains, thunderbolts—all these can be found in abundance throughout the park, in the form of special and practical effects. With a little creative planning, you could spin a little “meta-story” out of some of them.

And creativity is, after all, what my Unauthorized Fun category is all about!

It does not need to be literally raining for you to take advantage of this unofficial tour; in fact, you'll have more control over the beats of the “story” if there's no real weather to contend with. On the other hand, a little real rain wont hurt you either. It's just for fun, after all.

Let's start the tour!

Characters Count

As my readers may already be aware, there was a kerfuffle in the Disney theme park fandom recently, concerning comments made by Grand Poobah Bob Iger to the effect that IP-based attractions are inherently superior to original ones. Big Bad Bob's description of Expedition Everest as “nondescript” and “themed like India or whatever” evoked such a backlash that it was later edited out of the transcript of the interview where he said it, in addition to which he assured us all over Twitter that he loves Expedition Everest. But I don't think anyone takes him at his word, because the insensitive wording was part of a larger assertion that what guests really want out of their Disney theme park visit is to encounter Disney characters (and that's why IP rides are so, so great).

Except...Bob? Disney characters are all over the original attraction concepts. Expedition Everest itself has a particular infamous one: the giant Yeti. He (?) may not be a particularly detailed character, but he's still a character, a recognizable one, and he was created for a Disney production, ergo he is a Disney character.

And if anything, Everest's Yeti is one of the least interesting of the park-original characters, insofar as it's just a huge ferocious animal. (Even that other famous Disney theme park Yeti, Harold of the Matterhorn Bobsleds, has a little more going on—he's a collector!*) There are quite a few attraction personalities with a lot more...well, personality. Turns out, the Imagineers are kind of awesome at drawing characters in broad strokes so that you can get what they're about even in the compressed timeframe of a typical theme park attraction.

Here are just a few examples, past and present.

It Came From the Fandom: Disneyland Halloween Costumes

Anyone remember this post? No? Fair enough; it was an awfully long time ago by blog standards. I guess that means I'm not repeating myself too badly if I do another post about Disneyland-themed costumes!

First, I should probably go ahead and re-post my photo collage from...jeez Louise, five years ago at this point. AKA “That Time I Was the Small World Clock Tower For Halloween”:

Not pictured: my dignity

(If you're wondering, how did she do that?, please follow the link above. If on the other hand you're wondering, why did she do that?, I'm afraid I can't help you. Who knows why wackos like me do anything?)

In sharing the above with the internet, I have definitely outed myself as one of the geekiest of the Disneyland geeks. Disney Halloween costumes are thoroughly mainstream (and sold in the parks in children's sizes), but Disneyland Halloween costumes are the domain of the truly obsessed and, with very few exceptions, require DIY skills to achieve. So when you see someone walking around dressed as an iconic character from the parks—or even worse, an iconic structure (*cough*)—you know you're witnessing a True Believer at work.

We're rare, but we're out there. For this week's post, I'll share some of the ones I found perusing Google.*

(Disclaimer: Not all of these people are celebrating Halloween. Some of them are at conventions, including D23.)

It Came From the Fandom: That's From Disneyland!

The Disneyland-related benefits of living in Los Angeles do not stop with proximity to the resort itself. Because the park has remained primarily of interest to locals (as opposed to tourists like its Orlando counterpart), the hardcore fan community is pretty centralized to Southern California. As well, this city being a major hub—maybe the major hub—for the entertainment industry as a whole means that, to put it delicately, there are quite a few stinking rich people in this area. And that all means that, on those rare occasions when Disneyland just up and gets rid of something, it tends to end up in the possession of someone who lives nearby...and in the fullness of time, many of these things come back to the fan community in some way.

One of those ways is by being loaned for display to the Van Eaton Galleries, an art distributor and auction house headquartered in Sherman Oaks, CA, perhaps a 45-minute drive from Disneyland...and about five miles away from the residence of Yours Truly. I manage to drop in whenever they have a Disneyland memorabilia collection on the premises. The subsequent auctions are invariably too rich for my blood, but they let you take as many photos in the meantime as you like.

For the most recent exhibit, still (barely) ongoing, they've ramped things up. This time, the feature is the collection of Disneyland megafan Richard Kraft, including everything from concept art to decommissioned ride vehicles, and there weren't no way that was going to fit into their regular exhibition rooms or even the overflow space next door. So they've leased a two-story retail location* for a full-on, museum-style pop-up exhibit and gift shop, freely open to the public. The name of the exhibit? That's From Disneyland!

That name says it all, doesn't it? They certainly know who their audience is—people who know Disneyland's iconography by sight and need no other reason to love it.

What? Of course I've been there. What kind of question is that? Here are just a few of the nice photos I got...

Tropical Hideaway and Other Adventureland Thoughts

I...actually don't know how to categorize this post.

Slightly old news at this point, I know, but I’ve been thinking lately about the announcement earlier this year concerning a plan to gut Aladdin’s Oasis and replace it with something called the Tropical Hideaway. Details are sketchy so far, but the official announcement describes it as an “exotic traders' market” where Jungle Cruise skippers will hang out, and the accompanying concept art depicts tables and chairs for outdoor dining and what appear to be a few Tiki birds.

If you’ve been following this blog for any length of time, you know that my default reaction to these sorts of announcements is one of extreme skepticism—i.e. “You’re doing WHAT to MY PARK???”—but in this case, I’m actually all for it. The whole concept of Aladdin’s Oasis in Adventureland has never sat right with me, for a variety of reasons. Here are some of them:

Flipping the Script: Enchanted Tiki Room

Okay, so it wound up being two weeks instead. I'm still getting back up to speed in more ways than one.

For those of you in similar circumstances (getting up to speed, that is), Flipping the Script is my new post category addressing the wide (but perhaps not wide enough) world of Disney-attractions-turned-movies. Last time, I briefly examined the existing list of such movies to see what does and doesn't work about them. Now it's time to start proposing my own ideas for what Disney could do with this underserved concept in the future. And the first one is perhaps a little obvious, but I think it potentially has legs: the Enchanted Tiki Room!

After-Action Report: Disabled at Disneyland

Yes, the blog is still on hiatus due to Yours Truly's knee injury, but this topic intimately concerns said injury, so I figured I'd throw you a bone. (All, what, three of you?) I may do this from time to time until I'm properly back in the saddle and can commit to a weekly schedule again. The point is, a torn ACL, etc. is no excuse to cancel previously existing theme park plans, so the other day I got to undergo the Disneyland Wheelchair Experience.

My challenge was in fact twofold: 1) a complete inability to put weight on my left leg, and 2) this big honking immobilizing brace they're having me wear until further notice, additionally preventing me from bending said leg...unless I take it off, which is technically an option, but one I want to avoid as much as possible. I mention this because it serves as a contrast with my previous secondhand glimpses of the Disneyland Wheelchair Experience, with a party member who could walk, just not for hours at a time. No ride or attraction need be off-limits to such an individual. I knew from the outset that my situation was going to be a bit more dire than that.

So how did it work out? Here are some of the highlights. And lowlights.

Beyond Blue Sky: Disney Parks and Kingdom Hearts

You know what I haven't talked about in a good while? Video games.

I like video games. I want to say I love them, but in all honesty? If I truly loved them I'd probably play more of them. Keeping on top of the medium takes a serious investment of time and money that I'm just not willing to put in. It would too greatly hamper my ability to pursue everything else I do...including this blog. I'm usually vaguely aware of the latest developments in the industry, but the most advanced console in my personal possession is...a PlayStation 2.

But that's okay. You know what I can play on a PS2? Kingdom Hearts.

I've mentioned before that there are many similarities between playing a video game, especially one with a “sandbox” structure, and visiting a theme park. The games in the Kingdom Hearts series are not very sandbox-y, but they are especially comparable to a Disneyland visit, and not just because of the whole Disney mega-crossover thing. Game progression in this series revolves around traveling to a succession of “worlds,” like miniature planets, each a unique setting with its own theme and quirks. In the first game alone (the one I own and the only one I am especially familiar with—see above), the playable worlds include a tropical island, a gorilla-inhabited jungle, an underwater realm, a spooooooky haunted realm, a pseudo-futuristic/steampunk/magepunk palace, Wonderland, Neverland, and the 100-Acre Wood. Kingdom Hearts II adds a fairy tale castle, a pirate cove, a world of classic cartoons, and a virtual reality computer world, among others. I can't keep track of all the prequels and interquels and whatnot cluttering up the franchise, but the third proper installment is due to be released next year, and...guys?

There's theme park in it.

One of the game's special features will have the hero summon ride vehicles—actual ride vehicles, ranging in type from a Big Thunder Mountain train to a pair of spinning Teacups—and ride in them to gain advantages during battle sequences. As a charming bonus, the vehicles show up outlined in little colored lights, à la Electrical Parade floats:

Disney's most ambitious and unique concept has finally been included in what is probably its most successful video game franchise. I'm surprised the park fans aren't talking about it more.* But it's not really fully integrated, is it? The “summons” in these games are fun, but they're basically cameos. They're not part of the story. The stuff that matters in these games is bound up in the various worlds you travel to and the native characters you meet there.

You can probably tell where I'm going with this. Just for fun, here's some completely speculative fanwank on my part about how certain Disneyland attractions might fit into the Kingdom Hearts series as actual worlds. Naturally, there's more to consider than just “Is this cool?” Ideally, a world for this game franchise should combine:

• A striking setting
• Potential unique gameplay elements
• Potential thematic enemy types/bosses
• Characters who can be your allies

Even of the existing worlds, not all of them hit all four points, but most of them hit at least three, and the exceptions are typically uniquely positioned within the plot—for instance, in the first game, “End of the World” contains no allies, but that's because it's the last dang stage in the game, described as a conglomeration of destroyed worlds—what friendly character could reasonably be expected to show up there?

So here's what I've come up with.

Armchair Imagineering: Three Prompts

Ian Kay over at Pure Imagineering has started presenting his followers with Imagineering Prompts—just quickie creative exercises for the Disney theme park fan community. I don’t have a Tumblr so I haven’t responded directly, but in the interest of maintaining momentum over here while I develop my Next Big Post, here are my responses to the three he has offered so far.

Beyond Blue Sky: The Building Blocks Of Magic, Part 2

(Don't worry, I promise this will not turn into a LEGO blog.)

So the Genie or the Blue Fairy or somebody must have bugged my apartment back in March, because the news has broken that the LEGO Company will release a Disney castle later this year! It's going to be Cinderella's Castle from Orlando, not Sleeping Beauty Castle, but a) I predicted this in the earlier post, and b) I'll buy it anyway if I can remotely justify the expense. I want to send a clear message to the decision-makers in charge of this stuff that Disney theme park LEGO sets are a VERY GOOD idea.

And because my imagination is a naive optimist, it's taking this news and running wild with more ideas for other Disneyland-based sets. Bear with me while I geek out some more?

Beyond Blue Sky – Four Disneyland Headcanons

Disneyland tells a lot of stories...a lot of extremely incomplete stories. Even the longest, most intricately designed ride hasn't enough time and space to give us all the details. We're left with a sharply abridged narrative, or perhaps even just a series of vignettes with no explicit “plot” to connect them.

It's like I keep saying: this park is awesome.

A story told piecemeal is practically an engraved invitation to fill in the gaps with your own interpretations, speculations, and headcanons.* These bits of fanfiction might be as simple as names assigned to animatronic characters who don't have official ones, or as elaborate as a “how they met” story for all 17 Country Bears. The vast majority will probably fall somewhere in the middle.

Here are four of mine.

Armchair Imagineering: PVC Figurines

(Tip of the hat to fellow-blogger and commenter Cory Gross, whose recent post about his kitbashed Disney board game Talismouse started a conversation which led to this post.)

This is going to be a bit of a different Armchair Imagineering post than the usual. Instead of sharing my grand ideas for rides, attractions, and holiday overlays, this one is about...souvenirs. Merchandise. Swag.

Souvenirs are obviously a big part of Disneyland, but most of the ones available seem to revolve around Disney's film and television IPs. It's not difficult to see why this is: It's easier to sell people stuff they recognize than stuff that might be brand-new to them. Tourists are having a terrific time at the park, to be sure, but they might not be falling in love with the individual attraction characters to the extent that they're willing to blow their memorabilia budget on Hitchhiking Ghosts when that Winnie the Pooh plush is right there, promising to make them feel like a kid again. So there's a lot more of the latter than the former lining the shelves.

Then, too, most of the merchandise that specifically references the park treats Disneyland* like a holistic entity, with little attention paid to its individual components. If you had only tee-shirts and picture frames to go by, you could easily be forgiven for thinking that the place consisted only of a castle with animated characters cavorting around it:

Celebrating 60 Years of Painfully Generic Branding

More specific items exist, of course...but the execution is inconsistent. There are pins, if you're into that sort of thing, and the odd plush toy. Beyond that, things start to get pretty pricey. At the low end, a handful of the popular Ear Hat Ornaments are based on rides, but they're twenty-five bucks a pop, making it a daunting task to build a collection. That, and they're Christmas tree ornaments based on Mickey Mouse ear beanies, meaning that the rides in question are not being allowed to stand on their own as souvenirs. The “purer” the attraction merchandise gets, the more expensive it gets. If you love more than one ride for its own sake, but you're not rich, it can be all but impossible to express your love via knickknacks.

The Second Sense: Adventureland Music Loops

It would be nice—I guess—to close out Adventureland August with a bang, but the Disneyland Dilettante isn't just about the E-tickets and momentous events. The smaller stuff definitely has its place here too...maybe even a more cherished place, considering how often it's overlooked by not only the general park-going public but even the aficionados. There are entire websites dedicated to extolling the virtues of the Haunted Mansion or catering to the exalted fraternity of Jungle Cruise skippers, but when was the last time you saw even the smallest blog post praising the Silhouette Studio?

This blog post is not about the Silhouette Studio. It's about a feature of Disneyland that actually does have a following (though it's still definitely a niche interest by normal standards): background music.* This is one of those under-appreciated but absolutely essential parts of the Disneyland experience, like the standards of cleanliness. Most guests don't really notice that it's there. They might not overtly notice if it were gone...but they would certainly feel the detriment on some level. What would Main Street be without its light orchestra instrumentals? The New Orleans Square riverfront without its lively Dixieland jazz? Frontierland without its Western folk tunes or Fantasyland without its (gasp) actual Disney songs?

And where would Adventureland be without its...uh...hang on...huh.

Adventureland does not have an overall area music loop. I can think of potential reasons for this oddity. Perhaps there aren't enough good places along the walkway to install speakers for such ambiance. Perhaps the diversity of the locations represented is such that no single loop could adequately serve. Perhaps it was decided that any ambient music would detract from the impression of a remote area where survival is Priority Number One and performing arts are an unaffordable luxury.

Or maybe, given how narrow the walkable space is, an overall loop would clash with the queue loops for the individual attractions. Because Adventureland does have a plethora of background music tailored to its specific offerings. This, of course, is one way to get around the second issue mentioned above. So let's take a tour!

60 Disneyland Diamonds: 1956-1965

Welcome back! Last week, I announced a new post series I'll be running here at the Disneyland Dilettante in honor of Disneyland's 60^th birthday: 60 Disneyland Diamonds for the Diamond Anniversary. So let's get the ball rolling with the first ten!

After-Action Report: Enchanted Tiki Room

I had so much fun assembling last week's post about hosting an Enchanted Tiki Room-themed luau that I decided to dedicate this week's article to the attraction itself.

Having already written one of these for the Jungle Cruise, the obvious thing to do is a compare-and-contrast between these two Adventureland attractions from Disneyland's first decade. So here it is: In addition to the two points of commonality already mentioned, the Jungle Cruise and the Enchanted Tiki Room both heavily feature comedy involving audio-animatronic tropical animals. And that's about it for similarities.

The Jungle Cruise is a boat ride, the Enchanted Tiki Room a stationary show. The Jungle Cruise evokes Africa, Southeast Asia, and South America, while the Enchanted Tiki Room evokes Hawaii. The animals in the Enchanted Tiki Room are all birds, while the Jungle Cruise showcases a few birds, lots of mammals, some reptiles, and even fish and insects. The Enchanted Tiki Room is about one-and-a-half times as long as the Jungle Cruise—over twice as long if you include the pre-show. The Enchanted Tiki Room revolves around music; the Jungle Cruise decidedly does not. The Enchanted Tiki Room presents a pre-programmed show that never varies, while the Jungle Cruise, thanks to its live spiel, is different every time.

Do I have to keep going?

Kidnap the Magic: Enchanted Tiki Luau

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Spring has sprung and the weather is warming up! It's the time of year when people start to think about moving their recreational activities outdoors, and one of the classics is the luau. A better term might actually be “Hawaii theme party,” since we mainlanders don't usually follow all the genuine island traditions, but “luau” is the accepted term used by all the party supply stores. Luau gear is in abundance all throughout the spring and summer in the U.S.—all the leis, tiki torches, and plastic piña colada glasses molded to look like coconut halves that you could want.

But this isn't just any party planning guide. This is the Disneyland Dilettante! And when a Disneyland aficionado gets it into their head to hold a luau, there's only one place to go...

To the Tiki, Tiki, Tiki, Tiki, Tiki Room!

In this issue of Kidnap the Magic, I'll provide tips for turning your party space into a tropical hideaway for the lucky people you welcome there.