After-Action Report: Disabled at Disneyland

Yes, the blog is still on hiatus due to Yours Truly's knee injury, but this topic intimately concerns said injury, so I figured I'd throw you a bone. (All, what, three of you?) I may do this from time to time until I'm properly back in the saddle and can commit to a weekly schedule again. The point is, a torn ACL, etc. is no excuse to cancel previously existing theme park plans, so the other day I got to undergo the Disneyland Wheelchair Experience.

My challenge was in fact twofold: 1) a complete inability to put weight on my left leg, and 2) this big honking immobilizing brace they're having me wear until further notice, additionally preventing me from bending said leg...unless I take it off, which is technically an option, but one I want to avoid as much as possible. I mention this because it serves as a contrast with my previous secondhand glimpses of the Disneyland Wheelchair Experience, with a party member who could walk, just not for hours at a time. No ride or attraction need be off-limits to such an individual. I knew from the outset that my situation was going to be a bit more dire than that.

So how did it work out? Here are some of the highlights. And lowlights.

Starting the Day Off Right: The Mickey Van

We discovered the Mickey Van on one of the aforementioned previous visits with a party member whose mobility was impaired only slightly. It's a great little service for people who need wheelchair transport and prefer a much shorter wait (than the parking lot tram) and a modicum of privacy...but I have trouble figuring out what Disney gets out of providing the service since they don't charge for it. Have I stumbled across one of the few remaining pockets of pure guest service in the resort?

Poor Communication Kills: Haunted Mansion (Holiday)

I had my wheelchair, purchased just a few days earlier from a Craigslist ad. I also had crutches, to help me with ride vehicle transfer and other tight situations.

“Can you get out and walk on the crutches?” asked the Cast Member dispensing queue bypasses for disabled guests.

“Yes,” I said, not knowing what the exact options were. I can make it short distances on my crutches, easy-peasy.

What I can't do easily, I discovered—what I hadn't realized I would be expected to do based on a “Yes” answer—is stand through the elevator sequence and endure Haunted Mansion Holiday crowds, with the attendant stop-and-go traffic, down the entire length of the Changing Portrait Hall to the load area. My right leg, the one that has to do all the work when I am on the crutches, was screaming at me. It recovered quickly enough once I was sitting in the Doom Buggy (with more leg room than I expected), but oooowwwwwwwwwwww.

I also had significant trouble negotiating the speedramp afterward.

I was not angry at the Cast Members. They were following their protocol. But I politely suggested that they be more specific and up-front with the expectations for walking vs. not walking. The Haunted Mansion is an unusual case due to its lengthy preshow. If an Annual Passholder like me didn't grok what was being asked of me, a less experienced guest can't possibly be expected to know what they're in for.

Pleasant Surprise: Pirates of the Caribbean

I didn't expect to be able to ride Pirates this time around. I can't walk up or down stairs, or get into my bathtub without employing a laborious special process, and the act of boarding the boat seemed like it would combine aspects of both. We arranged a wheelchair return time, with the understanding that this was just so I wouldn't be entirely alone while the rest of my party waited through the regular queue, and I planned to sit things out at the unload dock, in the marvelous bayou atmosphere.

But you see, I had reckoned without...the Doohickey.

I don't remember what they called it. It's a little device they can hook onto the side of the boat, like a really short stepladder made of seat cushions, and it enables folks at or about my current level of impairment to maneuver their way into and out of the vehicle. So that was awesome.

Special Technique: Disneyland Railroad

With some rides, you have to wait for the special vehicle that has wheelchair accommodations. The Disneyland Railroad is one of those. There was someone ahead of me with even more pronounced impairment and my group didn't want to have to wait for the special train to make an extra circuit, so instead I pulled out the same technique I've been using to get to my job on the second floor: the Backwards Butt Scoot.

I was very slightly surprised that they let me. Very slightly.

All Hail the Queen!: “it's a small world” and Jungle Cruise

Both of these rides have one or more boats with wheelchair accommodations, and in these instances we made use of them. The process of being loaded onto the lifts was “fun” for a given value of fun—sort of a ride within a ride. But I did notice a downside, more pronounced on the “it's a small world” boat: I was elevated above the rest of my party and surrounded by railings, which had a bit of an isolating effect. Better than not riding, though.

VIP Treatment: Parade Route

We'd been looking for a decent spot to watch Mickey's Soundsational! for a grand total of about a minute and a half when a Cast Member approached and directed us to the specially marked disabled viewing area, located at the extreme Main Street end of the parade route outside the Disney Showcase. This was good because it involved shade, of which there was precious little available by the time we decided we were going to sit down and watch the parade after all.

Self-Service: Enchanted Tiki Room

The Enchanted Tiki Room is one of the most wheelchair-accessible attractions in the park, which seems odd when you consider that the entrance is up a flight of stairs. There's a cleverly disguised lift off in one corner of the Tiki Garden, right next to the statue of Ngendei. We were told that we were at liberty to make use of the elevator ourselves; fortunately, the controls are clearly labeled and the instructions are explicit. The lift debouches onto the upper walkway at the back of the building, the one normally used to exit the show.

You go in a lot of attraction back doors when using a wheelchair.

Overall

You can fault Disney for a lot of things vis-a-vis their theme parks these days, but they bat close to a thousand when it comes to accommodations for the mobility-impaired. Everyone did their utmost to keep me both safe and able to participate to the fullest extent possible. If you ever find an upcoming vacation marred by an accident of this kind, don't let it stop you from experiencing the Happiest Place on Earth.