Beyond Blue Sky: A Princess For Every Land

Let's be perfectly clear: Most animated Disney movies are not “Princess movies.” Run the numbers, and you’ll find that a protagonist in the Disney Animated Canon is much more likely to be some kind of non-human animal than a young lady of royal disposition.

If not both...

But the Princesses are probably the most collectively visible characters under the Disney banner, and not just because they have a merchandise brand. And there are quite a few of them, especially when you expand beyond the fairly restrictive boundaries* of said brand. They are perhaps the quintessential Fantasyland characters, but are so popular for meet-and-greets that Fantasyland alone cannot contain them. Not only do Princesses pop up in other parts of Disneyland and even across the way in California Adventure, but Fantasyland itself annexed a chunk of Main Street in order to host the Princesses in Fantasy Faire.

So here's an idea that's kinda fun and silly: Can we assign each land in the Disneyland Resort its very own, focus-tested, thematically or at least situationally appropriate Princess? And by we, I of course mean I. I have too much respect for you to ever accuse you of finding enjoyment in something this self-referentially nerdy.

It should go without saying, but I am not restricting this project to the “official” Disney Princesses, or even the official Princesses plus the few characters that everyone assumes will become official sooner or later. That wouldn't be enough, in terms of raw numbers or variety of character types. Instead, I am taking into consideration official Princesses, presumed future official Princesses, and characters from theatrical releases who are referred to as princesses and/or presumed to be princesses in-universe. Basically, if fans are prone to wondering why a character isn't included in the brand, we can give her an honorarium for the purposes of this post.

Got it? Good.

Disneyland Park

Land: Main Street, USA

Princess: Cinderella (Cinderella, 1950)

Explanation: I am no fan of Cinderella—or Cinderella, for that matter—but I’m not going to sit here and pretend she’s not the overall “face” of the Disney Princess brand. That alone makes her a reasonably good match for Main Street, which gives people their first impression of Disneyland, and in addition, Cindy frequently makes morning appearances out in front of the Main Street Train Station, offering photo-ops to newly arriving guests.

Land: Adventureland

Princess: Jasmine (Aladdin, 1992)

Explanation: Jasmine was the first Princess to have a natural “home” outside of Fantasyland, once Aladdin’s Oasis opened in 1993. The Oasis is still in operation—barely—and she still shows up there for meet-and-greets from time to time. Lately, though, her place has been largely usurped by Moana...but on the other hand, Moana insists she's not a Princess, so Jasmine remains functionally unchallenged. For now.

Land: New Orleans Square

Princess: Tiana (The Princess and the Frog, 2009)

Explanation: Well, duh. I maintain my theory that Frog was set where it was specifically to add some (year-round) animated character presence to New Orleans Square. They have not disappointed us—this is Tiana's normal hangout.

Land: Critter Country

Princess: Maid Marian (Robin Hood, 1973)

Explanation: My first digression from the canonical Princesses should be self-explanatory enough: Critter Country is a land of anthropomorphic animals, Maid Marian is an anthropomorphic animal, et voilà. Her medieval English background is a little hard to square with the rest of the land, but if Critter Country can include the Hundred-Acre Wood, can Sherwood Forest be far behind? In any case, I'm already committed to the exercise.

Land: Frontierland

Princess: Pocahontas (Pocahontas, 1995)

Explanation: I've mentioned before that the film Pocahontas isn't really in tune with the Frontierland theme. But it usually gets “assigned” there anyway, because Indians. Whatcha gonna do?

Land: Fantasyland

Princess: Aurora (Sleeping Beauty, 1959)

Explanation: Fantasyland is “Princess land” pretty much by default, and most of them fit comfortably there, even if they also fit comfortably somewhere else. But Aurora is the one with her alter ego attached to the Castle, so she can claim “ownership,” as it were. And it frees up the other “standard” Eurocentric fairytale Princesses to branch out and explore their unique traits.

Land: Mickey's Toontown

Princess: ???

Explanation: Here we hit our first major snag. A Toon Princess? Let's come back to this one...

Land: Tomorrowland

Princess: Kidagakash Nedakh (Atlantis: The Lost Empire, 2001)

Explanation: Atlantis may be an even rougher fit for Tomorrowland than Pocahontas is for Frontierland...but it does prominently feature a submarine, and when the film was new, Kida and her co-star Milo Thatch made appearances alongside the Submarine Lagoon.

Land: Star Wars: Galaxy's Edge

Princess: Leia (Star Wars franchise, 1977-present)

Explanation: I repeat: Duh. Does anyone else remember the joke that made the rounds right after the “Disney buys Lucasfilm” bombshell dropped that Leia could be a Disney Princess now? Nevertheless, it probably says something about a) my enthusiasm for this dorky little project and b) my general state of mind regarding Disneyland and the Disney canon that I am even willing to reach out of animation altogether.

California Adventure

Land: Buena Vista Street

Princess: Snow White (Snow White and the Seven Dwarfs, 1937)

Explanation: With the area themed to evoke Walt Disney's early work and the Carthay Circle Theater restaurant commemorating the premiere of Snow White and the Seven Dwarfs, Snow White is the only natural choice for this land.

Land: Hollywood Land

Princess: Anna (Frozen, 2013)

Explanation: I make this assignment mainly because of the Frozen stage show currently performing in the Hyperion Theatre. Elsa would also be eligible by the rules I have set in place, but given that she is in fact a Queen, she can pull rank on her sister and refuse the extra responsibility of representing a themed area.**

Land: “a bug's land”

Princess: Dot (a bug's life, 1998)

Explanation: I doubt this one really needs an explanation. Dot is an ant princess from the very film that inspired “a bug's land.” As for why Dot and not her elder sister Atta (a more prominent character), it's not because Atta is actually crowned queen at the end of the movie but because “a bug's land” is a child-focused area and Dot is a child character. She even has her own...I guess we are forced to call it an “attraction” even though it's just a bunch of sprinklers: Princess Dot's Puddle Park.

Land: Cars Land

Princess: Vanellope von Schweetz (Wreck-It Ralph, 2012)

Explanation: She may not be a car herself, but Vanellope definitely rules the raceway. I imagine it's pretty hard to defy someone's authority when she can literally climb inside you and drive you where she wants you to go. Would that be grand theft auto or kidnapping? Why am I asking these questions? I blame you, Pixar!

Land: Pacific Wharf

Princess: Mulan (Mulan, 1998)

Explanation: It's not the most elegant placement, but Mulan is known to make character appearances in and around this area, presumably because Pacific Wharf is designed to resemble part of San Francisco, which has a prominent Chinatown. Normally this sort of “two steps removed” thing really bugs me, but Pacific Wharf also has a Chinese takeout eatery and a pin cart with Chinese design elements, so it barely avoids my wrath. Barely.

Land: Paradise Pier

Princess: Ariel (The Little Mermaid, 1989)

Explanation: Even before her ride opened, Ariel was already well represented in Paradise Pier—her name is on a restaurant and her dad's is on a carousel. You can argue till you're blue in the face that seaside does not equal The Little Mermaid and you would have an excellent point, but it is what it is.

Land: Grizzly Peak

Princess: Merida (Brave, 2012)

Explanation: Merida is tomboyish and outdoorsy—she would be right in her element in the rugged forested mountains of Grizzly Peak. Plus there's the whole bear connection—one way or another, Merida knows how to deal with bears.

Okay, so what about Mickey's Toontown, then? Well, which Princesses are left? By the criteria I have been using:

• Tiger Lily (Peter Pan, 1953)
• Eilonwy (The Black Cauldron, 1985)
• Belle (Beauty and the Beast, 1991)
• Rapunzel (Tangled, 2010)
• Elsa (Frozen, 2013)
• Moana, (Moana, 2016)

Do any of them work for Toontown? Meh, not really. They might be animated characters, but they're not Toons as Mickey's Toontown measures these things. Toons, in that sense, are slapstick characters from animated short subjects. In sharp contrast with their features, Disney's short cartoons are notably light on princesses. The only one that really leaps to mind is the violin from “Music Land” and as far as I can tell, she doesn't even have an official name.

Oh, and Minnie Mouse played a princess in a few shorts. But that doesn't make Minnie herself a princess by our standards. The core characters from the short subjects have always been treated by the company as actors who might appear in any sort of role. Said roles do not change their basic identities.

So it looks like Mickey's Toontown remains princess-less. But hey—fifteen out of sixteen ain't bad.

Till next time!

* There is a whole arcane set of criteria determining which leading ladies, literally royal and otherwise, can be considered for membership in the Official Disney Princess club. Ultimately, though, it really boils down to “How marketable is this chick?”

** I may be drifting more into fanfiction here.